And on the back it said 100% REAL COWS MILK
WHAT? If they have to advertise themselves as 100% real cows milk, then what in the fuck have I been drinking? I mean, for them to advertise themselves like that, it implies that other dairies use, i don't know, like 90% cows and 10% geese. Or maybe badgers. Or chipmunks. Or flies. Hell, I'll make a list of all the possible animals that I could've drank milk from:
ants
kangaroo
large mouth bass
st. bernard
mule
Okay, the list has begun to bore me. The point is...I'm repulsed.
This is the day I either give up on milk altogether, or switch to the rich, creamy 100% cow goodness that can only be found in cartons of Farmland Dairies milk. You can mark it on your calendar, yo!
In non-dairy news, the more I read this diary, the more I wish I could be one of his super cool friends. Or maybe one of his super foxy coworkers. Either way, it'd be super. My subtle point is this: GO READ HIS DIARY AND LAUGH OUT LOUD AT HIS SITCOM-LIKE ANTICS!
I got a Google hit today for "kittycats"
Awwwwwwwww.