taint nothing

So I was lying in bed this morning scratching my taint, wondering if maybe I should get out of bed and start my day, when I brought my hand out from underneath the covers and accidentally brushed it past my nose just as I was breathing in.

P.U.

My taint needs a Listerine Oral Care Strip.

I sat there wondering just what may have caused my taint to smell that foul and putrid and then it hit me. I accidentally got too close to my ass once on a downscratch and my finger slipped between the cheeks. That's what it was.

So I'm happy to report that my taint is as fresh as a field of roses. It's my ass that stinks, but hey! That's what an ass is supposed to do ain't it?

It's in the job description.

January 22, 2002 | 12:37 p.m.

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