these days

I've been moving for the past couple of weeks and haven't had time to write much and on top of that, even if I had had the time to do it, my computer's gone all wonky on me and won't turn on when I hit the button that says ON which leads me to believe something might be wrong.

I will now lay out the highlights of my past couple of weeks in an easy to read outline format:

A: SPIDERS
1. we got lots of 'em
2. they're everywhere
3. one of them was as big as a cat and the thought of it to this day gives me the heebie jeebies
4. the good news is that hardly any of them are inside the actual house

B: MUFF
1. we saw an old woman holding a sign on the street corner over where City Bites is in Norman that said MUFF FOR SALE
2. as we got closer we realized it said MUFFINS

C: TOTO
1. we found this bad-ass Italian restaurant called Toto's
2. the food is magically delicious
3. Toto is one cool open collar having, gold chain wearing, thick Italian accent speaking mutha
4. when he takes your order instead of saying thanks he throws his hands at you like you've just insulted his mama mia

D: ANKLE
1. I twisted my ankle moving furniture
2. it still hurts

E: LESBIANS
1. two lesbians asked me if I knew a good mechanic while I was pumping gas the other day at Albertson's
2. they wanted me
3. inquiring about a good mechanic is just Lesbianese for "I feel like branching out and would like to be entangled in a web of various intercoursal positions with your nubile, young man-body"

F: PUPPY DOG
1. me and Squeeks decided that when we get a dog we're gonna name it Captain Sassypants
2. we're gonna make it wear dog clothes at all times

G: WORK
1. it's where I'm at

May 16, 2002 | 11:56 a.m.

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