rattled by the rush

I've never seen such an abundance of gum tissue where once there was teeth in all my days as what I saw at the 6th annual Strut Your Mutt competition in the beautiful Little Vietnam section of Oklahoma City this afternoon.

We stuck around only long enough for the peanut butter eating contest before we decided there were too many undesirables around to warrant us seeing it through to the end.

Our dog lost the contest.

Some black dog wearing a coconut bra won it.

Our dog's loss wasn't as big as an ordeal as we feared, though. He seemed to take it in stride compared to a little yorkie dog named Yahtzee which was also in the contest.

Maybe Yahtzee's grief was best expressed by the judge, who muttered those immortal words, which, I'm sure, has ended not only the peanut butter eating contest in which we participated, but peanut butter eating contests the world over:

"Yahtzee's throwin' up! Yahtzee's throwin' up!"

So we split the scene and headed to a new dog park we drove by one day over by Lake Hefner.

He fucking went apeshit.

You know how dogs get.

April 17, 2004 | 10:02 p.m.

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