I wasn't picking them out to throw them away. I was doing some hardcore pecan eatin'. I had my own personal mosh pit on the front porch with the pecans. I chipped a tooth or two and got a cut above my right eye, but other than that I'm OK.
So, there I was watching the lightning, headbuttin' the pecans, and listening to the Stone Roses first album (their ONLY album as far I'LL ever be concerned) and thinking about my granny.
She used to make me crack pecans 'til my hands bled.
That's all really. That's all I thought about her. I didn't mutter any horrible things about her under my breath because she was a sweet old lady.
A slavedriving pecan-crazy sweet old lady.
Oh, and she was absolutely horrified of cheese. Even the mention of it would send her into a fit of uncontrollable terror and anger.
I wouldn't lie about such a matter.