He fixed it. I had no doubt that he would. That's just how he is.
But now it's 7 AM, six hours later, and I just got up to have a pee and I look into the living room and notice that the couch is sitting there with no fabric on it and he's lying in the middle of the hardwood floor taking apart a toaster.
He had decided that 3 in the morning would be an ideal time to wash the couch. And the sad thing is it's not the first time he's decided this.
I came clean about stealing his hair care products yesterday when we were in Hobby Lobby. Yes, I went to Hobby Lobby. It's cool. Everyone's doing it. I had to purchase some items with which to make something.
Oooh oooh oooh, and I also figured out what to get all my friends for christmas and since none of them read this or even know about it, I'm telling. We were at the counter purchasing our stuff and what do my wandering eyes happen upon but a kit with enough raw material to make exactly ten What Would Jesus Do? bracelets.
I was all, "Mmmmmmmm. WWJD"
I knew right then and there that all my friends were getting a WWJD bracelet for christmas. And I was only gonna be out $2.99!
So I got home and I was sitting at the kitchen table listening to some music and I thought to myself, "I'm almost 28 years old and I'm sitting here making WWJD bracelets. I ROCK!"
But then I started thinking that since Hobby Lobby had so much crap, surely they would have little beads that had all the letters of the alphabet rather than just the three I had purchased. And then the skies above opened up and the angels started singing...which is what usually happens when I have the greatest idea I've ever had in my entire life.
So now all my friends, instead of getting a WWJD bracelet to guide them through life's hard decisions, are each getting a What Would Brad Do? bracelet.
I can just imagine how the scenarios will play out:
Scenario One: Purchasing a #5 with cheese
SURLY CASHIER: What kinda drink you want with that?
FRIEND: (in silent thought) hmmm, what would Brad do?
SURLY CASHIER: Um excuse me...you can't masturbate in here.
Scenario Two: Being offered drugs on the street
NE'ER DO WELL: Yo want some weed?
FRIEND: (in silent thought) hmmm, what would Brad do?
NE'ER DO WELL: Nice doing business with you.
Scenario Three:1 On the bowl without a roll
FRIEND: (in silent thought) hmmm, what a predicament I've gotten myself into. What would Brad do in a situation like this?
GAY ROOMMATE: (three hours later) what's this brown stuff on my towel? (sniff) (sniff).....OH FUCK! IT'S SHIT! THERE IS SHIT ON MY TOWEL! SWEET LORD IN HEAVEN! (sniff) (sniff) WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING? THIS IS NASTY! THIS IS SO WRONG! (sniff) (sniff) OH WOE IS ME! (sniff) (sniff)
I'm gonna go back to bed.
All I intended to do was get up and pee.